doesnt make sense anymore

why am i so cruel to u
but why were u so cruel to me
i was acting in venegence
i want you to come back
im sorry
i should have kept my anger in check
but wait
u r so insensitive
why didnt u apologize
why didnt u realise u hurt my feelings
why did u have to act like an insensitive dickhead
i know u care about
i know u shower me with gifts
but why cant u be here with me when i need u most
u know i need u
but yet u kept away
what does this mean
i dont understand
somebody pls tell me
whats going on
im scared im scared
do u care about me the way i think u do
now that i think of it
it all happened so fast
was there some other reason
for all this generous affection
am i being made a fool of
or is there something i need to know of
i dont understand
but no wait no i dont doubt u
i know u
i know u well
so well now even tho it s just 3 months
or do i
am i being stupid
whats going on
i dont understand
doesnt make sense anymore

time after time....

ok for those of u who have ever come across my blog.. the last blog was posted when i was going thru a bad break up... it was tough.and i felt just like what i ve written on my previous post.. but now guess what almost a year later i met the nicest guy i cud ever find.. so it s all good... ever noticed when something bad happens u feel as if the whole world is crumbling down but a few hours,days, months later u sit back and laugh abt it.. coz actually it wasnt anything much...

u know what... i think time is the greatest healer of all things... well except for illnesses.. definitely for matters of the heart tho.. and yeah rebounds one night stands , tried and tested they dont really work... it s just time.. trust me on this one.. been on a few bad r ships where i was on the losing end.. and never thought i cud get over any of that but hey guess what ? i did.. and yes it took time but i still did it.. so for anyone out there with a broken heart just remember time heals...



so i shall stop now.. till i see some feedback or comment this is miss g signing off...

ps- while writing this blog i suddenly remembered smallville s version of time after time (with all due respect for miss lauper) in case u havent heard it check it out... very mellow.. yet stirs up some emotions

I Love/Hate you....

Missing you almost as much as much as I hate myself
How on earth could I be missing you….
Do I even cross your mind? At all?
I hope I do because you are all I think about
I wonder why? I’ve let out my anger and hurt in poisonous words
You’d never believe that I ever said those things
But I did.. and I will continue
It makes me happy and relieves my anger
I hate you almost as much as I love you

How could you forget about me so easily...
Thought you said you loved me...
Thought a day wouldnt pass by without me thinking of you..'
And still think so..
I miss you...
I miss you so much that it s overwhelming....
I miss you being mine
I miss being yours and yours only...
I wish you would realise how much I love you and how much you mean to me...
I really really do...
Maybe Ill forgive you for your insensitivites and hold you hug you kiss you....
I want to be with you and only you..
But why why can you not love me back... and how how could you forget so soon....
I love you and I hate you...
I want to see you smile and I want to see you cry...
I want to hold you in my arms forever and watch you sleep on my lap
But I want you to break down and cry when I walk by with someone new
I want you to repent and regret and break down and realise how much I loved you..
I hate you yet I love you the same...
Do you blame me for hating myself...